Good morning!
If you've been following me on diet.com you may know that I am engaged. On June 12th I will be saying "I do" to my boyfriend/fiance of 3 years 3 months & 2 weeks. (yes.. I still keep track). Yesterday was a fantastic moment. I took my dress to a bridal shop to be taken in. 2 hours later.. they finally finishing pinning my oversized dress. I bought this dress when I was 204 pounds. She has to take in 2 inches on both sides at the top!! As she pinned away I watched myself transform... I watched the pound disappear in an instant. And who I once was finally.. was no longer who I saw in the mirror. With great anticipation I happily stood in the gown of my dreams. A bride in the perfect white dress. Waiting for her groom. Literally waiting, since I have not seem my fiance in a few months.
Oh to be a bride.
I never thought I would get married. I wanted to.. I knew someday.. someone might Love me for who I was. But truly, I thought I might have to pay someone to truly understand me. My fiance met me a long time ago. He has loved me not for what I look like, but for who I am. Which makes weight loss so much more exciting. I know I don't have to look a certain way for him to be happy. So the fact that I'm thinner is an extra bonus.
It still surprises me that I am the bride. I am the one in Love. The one with the handsome man to marry.. the one with the big diamond ring. And it had nothing to do with the way I looked. I am loved, because I am me.
In 43 days I will put on my white perfectly fitted gown. My father will give me away. And I will Marry the Love of my life. And it will be beautiful, and perfect, all because of Love. And nothing else will matter.
Friday, April 30, 2010
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
My Heart
There is a movement across this world. A movement that promotes a healthy lifestyle. However there is an even greater epidemic, One that promotes obesity. Which Movement are we part of?
The question is.. how did we get this way??
"Many factors can contribute to obesity and overweight, such as, lifestyle choices (e.g., lack of exercise), medical conditions (e.g., hypothyroidism), and genetics (i.e., heredity). When a person takes in more calories than he or she uses, overweight and obesity result. These excess calories are stored in the body as fat, and unless weight-control strategies are put into place, more and more weight is gained." (Healthcommunities.com)
Look around you.. fast food.. fried food.. easy food.. fatty food. Do we even know what is in that food? Do we even know what it does? People joke about what they are eating. Sadly they don't realize the harm it is doing to their bodies. Truly examine the food. Check out the fat content. Check out the calories. We can not assume that a salad is good for us, just because it involves lettuce. Most food items and drinks hold more calories that you probably thought.
55 percent of the state I live in, is overweight or obese.
My heart is to help people realize how to eat, how to live, how to be healthy!
Some may not realize it, but when you are obese, it controls your life. Its takes the joy of life from you. The best part is, that can change.
I want to tell people my story, to help them see. That they can do anything! We all can do anything.
So today.. lets try harder, run faster, love harder, and live a healthy and whole life. Lets do it, together.
The question is.. how did we get this way??
"Many factors can contribute to obesity and overweight, such as, lifestyle choices (e.g., lack of exercise), medical conditions (e.g., hypothyroidism), and genetics (i.e., heredity). When a person takes in more calories than he or she uses, overweight and obesity result. These excess calories are stored in the body as fat, and unless weight-control strategies are put into place, more and more weight is gained." (Healthcommunities.com)
Look around you.. fast food.. fried food.. easy food.. fatty food. Do we even know what is in that food? Do we even know what it does? People joke about what they are eating. Sadly they don't realize the harm it is doing to their bodies. Truly examine the food. Check out the fat content. Check out the calories. We can not assume that a salad is good for us, just because it involves lettuce. Most food items and drinks hold more calories that you probably thought.
55 percent of the state I live in, is overweight or obese.
My heart is to help people realize how to eat, how to live, how to be healthy!
Some may not realize it, but when you are obese, it controls your life. Its takes the joy of life from you. The best part is, that can change.
I want to tell people my story, to help them see. That they can do anything! We all can do anything.
So today.. lets try harder, run faster, love harder, and live a healthy and whole life. Lets do it, together.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Thoughts today.
Today I was thinking about if I had never changed.
Lately I've been seeing a lot of people I haven't seen in a while. For my bridal shower, and soon I'll see people from college.
I am so glad I decided to do this. To challenge myself. To actually try and lose weight. I see obese people a lot. People who are over 300 pounds. People who use wheel chairs at stores to get around. Today I wanted to stop a lady from buying things I knew were bad for her. I heard a woman tell her child "Get this one, it has more."..
That is how I use to think. Get the large, the bigger, the most. Yesterday I got mad because I wanted a small ice cream and my parents got me a large. It was way to big. My sister ate half of it for me. I never would have thought I'd be mad over too much.
What if I was still 204 pounds? What if I still cried going clothes shopping? What If my wedding dress was still too tight? What if I still had chest pains? What if I still had a hard time breathing? What if I still ate fast food? What if I still didn't like the way I look..
What if I had not tried?
I don't want to raise obese children.. I don't want to live an unhealthy life..
I don't want to feel unattractive.. I don't want to be the way I was.
Some how I want to show people how to be healthier. So that they can live again.
There is hope and there is freedom. Change is possible. We can reach our goals. We can change..
Don't let anyone tell you that you can't changes, especially yourself.
I believe in you!
Lately I've been seeing a lot of people I haven't seen in a while. For my bridal shower, and soon I'll see people from college.
I am so glad I decided to do this. To challenge myself. To actually try and lose weight. I see obese people a lot. People who are over 300 pounds. People who use wheel chairs at stores to get around. Today I wanted to stop a lady from buying things I knew were bad for her. I heard a woman tell her child "Get this one, it has more."..
That is how I use to think. Get the large, the bigger, the most. Yesterday I got mad because I wanted a small ice cream and my parents got me a large. It was way to big. My sister ate half of it for me. I never would have thought I'd be mad over too much.
What if I was still 204 pounds? What if I still cried going clothes shopping? What If my wedding dress was still too tight? What if I still had chest pains? What if I still had a hard time breathing? What if I still ate fast food? What if I still didn't like the way I look..
What if I had not tried?
I don't want to raise obese children.. I don't want to live an unhealthy life..
I don't want to feel unattractive.. I don't want to be the way I was.
Some how I want to show people how to be healthier. So that they can live again.
There is hope and there is freedom. Change is possible. We can reach our goals. We can change..
Don't let anyone tell you that you can't changes, especially yourself.
I believe in you!
What I use to look like..
This blog is in connection to my previous blog "Proud pictures".
Every once in a while its good to see how far I've come.
(click on any picture to enlarge it)
These are pictures of me from when I was around 200 pounds.
Every once in a while its good to see how far I've come.
(click on any picture to enlarge it)
These are pictures of me from when I was around 200 pounds.
Proud pictures.
Today was a very proud day.
I took some pictures with my family (which I will have to post sometime).
I actually looked normal. For years I hated full body pictures. I always looked round... But today. Today was different! I looked good. I looked Normal. Being obese for so many years I always wanted to throw pictures away. Not I don't care. I like them! I like the way I look!
So.. I have decided to post some recent pictures from the past month or two..
Here you go!
Monday, April 19, 2010
The big 10
1 year has passed since I began this weight loss journey. I remember the day I lost my first 10 pounds. I had never lost weight on purpose. I wasn't even sure this exercise and eating healthy "thing" would work. To my surprise.. it did! I lost 10 pounds!.. It was a great feeling! I bought a cute purple shirt from target to celebrate. That shirt is huge on me now. But I still have it.. to remember that great moment in my life. The top 10. The most meaningful 10 pounds I ever lost.
(pictured above- me in the purple shirt, the day I hit my 10th pound mark)
I'm featured on diet.com!
My blog "Numbers" was featured on Diet.com's homepage. # 4. How cool is that! :)
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
numbers.
For a long time a number defined me. It was always a three digit number.
Always larger than I desired it to be. Always a secret number.
I felt ashamed at that number.
Today my number is better. It doesn't define me. In fact it is always changing! Which is the best part..
I lied on my license.
I said I weighed 155.. at the time I weighed 185. At the time.. I thought.. this number.. represents me.
I am two pounds away from being in a group of numbers that sounds sooo good! 140.. doesnt that sound thin? Well after being 204 .. it sound AMAZING!
I look forward to this number.. 149.
And although it won't define me. I will be so pound to be there.
Always larger than I desired it to be. Always a secret number.
I felt ashamed at that number.
Today my number is better. It doesn't define me. In fact it is always changing! Which is the best part..
I lied on my license.
I said I weighed 155.. at the time I weighed 185. At the time.. I thought.. this number.. represents me.
I am two pounds away from being in a group of numbers that sounds sooo good! 140.. doesnt that sound thin? Well after being 204 .. it sound AMAZING!
I look forward to this number.. 149.
And although it won't define me. I will be so pound to be there.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
The change
Its hard sometimes to give myself the credit. Last night I was thinking.. wow.. look how hard you worked. Look how much time and self control this took. Look how awesome the results are.
Its hard sometimes to realize.. I did this.
Hard work brought me to this place. I use to be on the road most taken. The road filled with snacks.. thoughtless meals.. eating without thinking. Now I'm I feel I'm on that "Skinny Winner" track. Eating good.. feeling good.
But it is a choice. Its an everyday choice. I really had to change who I am. How I eat is a huge part of my life.
Any sort of change takes work. We wish it didn't but it does.
The results are not only physical. I spent around 10 years of my life being obese.
I am 24. Which means since I was 14.. since people actually recalled what I looked like.. I was the "Fat Girl".
I hated gym class. Not because I didnt like to be active. I really wasnt good at it. In a room full of people who are, you really stand out.
I had my times of people making fun of me. Some people asked.. "When are you expecting".. I'm not pregnant. On my first real date with my fiance. Our host suggested to our server that I would not be drinking wine because I was expecting.
It was valentines day. I was dressing in a green silk shirt. I didn't think I looked pregnant. My fiance leaned over and said "What are we going to name it?".. Oh what a good man! We had been dating only a month. I knew he was a keeper right there. When I do become pregnant I decided I will take him back to that place to tell him.
Its been hard. People are mean and kids are so honest about what they think.
It feels like your hiding. Hoping no one sees, or no kid asks.. hey, why is you belly so big? Why are you wearing long pants in the summer? Why do you cry when you try on clothes? The list goes on.. there are so many things we do to try to hide ourselves. But we can not hide from how we feel. Its hard to breath, its hard to live, its hard to be yourself when yourself is spending all its time hiding the fat.
Or perhaps. We do not see what condition we are in yet.
Perhaps we are use to ourselves.
We are in control. We can make the change. Its hard, but we must realize for ourselves who we are and how we want to live. No one else can make the change.
Its hard sometimes to realize.. I did this.
Hard work brought me to this place. I use to be on the road most taken. The road filled with snacks.. thoughtless meals.. eating without thinking. Now I'm I feel I'm on that "Skinny Winner" track. Eating good.. feeling good.
But it is a choice. Its an everyday choice. I really had to change who I am. How I eat is a huge part of my life.
Any sort of change takes work. We wish it didn't but it does.
The results are not only physical. I spent around 10 years of my life being obese.
I am 24. Which means since I was 14.. since people actually recalled what I looked like.. I was the "Fat Girl".
I hated gym class. Not because I didnt like to be active. I really wasnt good at it. In a room full of people who are, you really stand out.
I had my times of people making fun of me. Some people asked.. "When are you expecting".. I'm not pregnant. On my first real date with my fiance. Our host suggested to our server that I would not be drinking wine because I was expecting.
It was valentines day. I was dressing in a green silk shirt. I didn't think I looked pregnant. My fiance leaned over and said "What are we going to name it?".. Oh what a good man! We had been dating only a month. I knew he was a keeper right there. When I do become pregnant I decided I will take him back to that place to tell him.
Its been hard. People are mean and kids are so honest about what they think.
It feels like your hiding. Hoping no one sees, or no kid asks.. hey, why is you belly so big? Why are you wearing long pants in the summer? Why do you cry when you try on clothes? The list goes on.. there are so many things we do to try to hide ourselves. But we can not hide from how we feel. Its hard to breath, its hard to live, its hard to be yourself when yourself is spending all its time hiding the fat.
Or perhaps. We do not see what condition we are in yet.
Perhaps we are use to ourselves.
We are in control. We can make the change. Its hard, but we must realize for ourselves who we are and how we want to live. No one else can make the change.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Ideal weight?
Check out this chart. Where do you stand?
I am 4'11. I am itty bitty. I'd like to say I have huge bones.. but.. I don't. I have a small frame. Little wrists, tiny legs. I carry my weight in my belly.
So.. looking at this cart my ideal weight is 103-113 pounds! Haha! WOW!
I use to be 204 pounds! yikes!
I am still 40 pounds overweight. Ughh. My goal of 130 might turn into a goal of 115. Imagine that! April 2011. 115 pounds! Hey.. this time last year I was 50 pounds heavier... I could do that!
I am 4'11. I am itty bitty. I'd like to say I have huge bones.. but.. I don't. I have a small frame. Little wrists, tiny legs. I carry my weight in my belly.
So.. looking at this cart my ideal weight is 103-113 pounds! Haha! WOW!
I use to be 204 pounds! yikes!
I am still 40 pounds overweight. Ughh. My goal of 130 might turn into a goal of 115. Imagine that! April 2011. 115 pounds! Hey.. this time last year I was 50 pounds heavier... I could do that!
What's your motivation?
I am getting married in 65 days. I have lost 51 pounds. I have won contests. Had articles written about me. I have had reasons, goals, and rewards. I have joined groups and websites. I have used all resources available to me. And yet.. I found myself looking in the mirror this morning. I am healthier, I am thinner, I am happier. And for the first time ever.. My motivation is looks. Yes.. I want to look better.
Perhaps its the upcoming wedding.. but I still want to lose more! 10 more this month. Yes .. I am going to try for 10 more pounds this month.
I was starting to feel comfortable. I like myself. I like the way I look. I like being in the 150's. Mostly because this is the thinnest I have been since jr high. But I'm still not there yet. I still have not reached my goal.
I am going on Vacation on May 4th. I hope to be 143 by then.
Perhaps its the upcoming wedding.. but I still want to lose more! 10 more this month. Yes .. I am going to try for 10 more pounds this month.
I was starting to feel comfortable. I like myself. I like the way I look. I like being in the 150's. Mostly because this is the thinnest I have been since jr high. But I'm still not there yet. I still have not reached my goal.
I am going on Vacation on May 4th. I hope to be 143 by then.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Get a pet and lose some pounds!
We found a rottweiler puppy running in the road on Easter.
We have been "fostering" him.
He has kept me active for the past few days.
I highly suggest getting a dog!
We can't keep him.. however he really helps! I'll miss him when he finds a new home.
We have been "fostering" him.
He has kept me active for the past few days.
I highly suggest getting a dog!
We can't keep him.. however he really helps! I'll miss him when he finds a new home.
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